The Melancholaholic

“Amalia, I find that my religiousness is a slowly emergent state, one that is entirely drawn to the Anglican church of my childhood, and that the haunted presence of Christ is the essential and defining quality of that state of being. Christianity, for me, is bound up in the liturgy and the ritual and the poetry that swirls around the restless, tortured figure of Jesus, as presented within the sacred domain of the church itself. My religiousness is softly spoken, both sorrowful and joyful, broadening and deepening, imagined and true. It is worship and prayer. It is resilient yet doubting, and forever wrestles with the forces of rationality, armed with little other than the merest hunch or whispered intuition. The defining characteristic of my belief, and which I consider to be a fundamental imperative in my life, is uncertainty. This questioning impulse is the essence of freedom and the creative catalyst that keeps the wheels rotating irrevocably toward God.” - N.C.

Freshly roasted pumpkin seeds are one of the best things fall has to offer. 🍽

Finished reading: Laurus by Eugene Vodolazkin 📚

“But is not Christ a general direction? asked the elder. What other kind of direction do you seek? And how do you even understand the journey anyway? As the vast expanses you left behind? … Do not become like your beloved Alexander who had a journey but had no goal. And do not be enamored of excessive horizontal motion.”

“Unless my senses deceive me, the old centuries had, and have, powers of their own which mere modernity cannot kill.” - Jonathan Harker’s Journal, Dracula, Bram Stoker 📚

Things I learned the hard way: The #2 attachment on my beard trimmer is significantly shorter than the #2 attachment on a Barber’s clippers.

🎵 Any release day that includes new music from Slowdive is red letter. everything is alive is gorgeous.

A fun and nostalgic read from W. David Marx on They Might Be Giants, early-90’s music fandom and the delightful nerdyness of the early days of the internet: “I wanted to offer a first-hand account of this particular moment of forgotten online culture. More objectively this era is interesting as further example of the general principle that content on platforms always bends to the taste of the median user. The internet was once an AV lab inside of a college library and then it became a combination Spencer’s Gifts/rural weekend militia camp for white nationalists.”

Tim Adams on Tom Waits upcoming remastered mid-80’s Trilogy: ‘Waits, he recalls, would never be specific about what he wanted; it would be “play like a Russian barmitzvah, or Alice in Wonderland”. “You didn’t say, ‘What does that mean, Tom?’ – you just went for it. I think when something began to sound like the song he wrote in his mind, that’s where we started.”’

Alan Jacobs: “It is not true that silence is violence. The mandate to comment, to take a stand, to lend your voice — that is a violence against art. We need at least some artists who are too busy thinking and creating to notice what everyone else is talking about. We need artists who never, ever tweet or post or vlog — artists who block what blocks art. When accepting an Emmy for her TV show I May Destroy You in 2021, Michaela Coel counselled her fellow artists, ‘Do not be afraid to disappear — from it, from us — for a while, and see what comes to you in the silence.’ Silence, I think, is the first cunning, the aboriginal resistance.”

Currently reading: A Short History of the Interpretation of the Bible by Robert M. Grant, David Tracy 📚

“Jesus is not a theologian but the despair of theologians. No systematic treatment can do justice to the richness and variety of his thought.” (18)

Where my theologians at? Thoughts?

Wyatt Mason/Tom Waits (2017)“We also touched upon Leonard Cohen, who once said, ‘If I knew where the good songs came from I’d go there more often.’ (‘For the rest of us,' Waits said, ‘it appears, not only did he go there often, he got a room in the tower, and he paid in advance for a whole month.')”

Richard Brody on the vocational awakening found in a children’s book:

”I learned, through Anatole’s cheese reviews, that, by expressing one’s pleasures and displeasures, one could make a positive contribution to the world, and that the expression of one’s very personal sense of taste, if done the right way, could itself be a creative act.”

Olivia Reingold on the surprising power of the cold contact:

“These days, everyone says networking is the route to success. But I’ve always been a strong believer that any door can open if you score the right invitation. My advice? Don’t ever ask to “pick” someone’s brain. The trick is to get inside their brain. Start by googling them, or rereading or relistening to their work. Why do you like it? Tell them that. Make them know they matter. A good cold email is not unlike a good love letter. It should make you feel vulnerable. Cathartic.”

Periodic Re-Read: The marriage of Heaven and Hell by William Blake 📚

🎵 If you are a pop music fan who might describe their relationship to the most important songs in their life as “spiritual”, I have a newsletter for you.

Arthur C. Brooks in The Atlantic:

“A good deal of social and political activism is zero-sum, and admits only two possible outcomes: winning or losing. When these causes become an uphill battle, as commonly happens, losing is likely. Then the disappointment can be crushing.

None of this is to say that activism is a mistake; that is for each person to decide. But much of the data present a challenge for people who want to stay engaged without sacrificing their mental health—as well as for people in positions of political leadership and in academia, who often encourage young people to be involved in important causes.

A compromise might be available through minimizing activism’s most psychologically harmful elements: hatred and defeat. A shift in perspective—from winning to helping—can address both problems. This could mean a switch from protesting homelessness to providing services for people experiencing homelessness—for instance, by volunteering at a shelter or soup kitchen—or from marching against the president to giving people a ride to the polling station. Focus on what you can do to ameliorate a situation rather than simply demonstrating your opposition to it.”

Brooks here taps into various wisdom traditions to make an important point:

When faced with enormous and seemingly intractable problems, the best and most sustainable approach to activism is to “do small things with great love.”

I would wear the hell out of this boygenius t-shirt.

🎵Now Listening — Memento Mori by Depeche Mode on Apple Music 

This is, without doubt, the most exciting music they’ve released since Ultra. Excellent album.

Just your semi-periodic reminder that this oft-slept-upon gem is one of the best records of the 90’s… and of U2’s career.

The heavens meet the earth at East Sands.

This is actually great advice for anyone doing creative/generative work who struggles with perfection paralysis, courtesy of the never boring Willem Dafoe:

Willem Dafoe: "...the idea of trying to fail." pic.twitter.com/kFrxCk165j

— Sheet Music Library (PDF) (@LibrarySheet) March 14, 2023

There is very little that is more satisfying than watching your child prepare for something that causes them significant fear, face into it with courage, and succeed. I’m always proud of my daughter, but it’s a joy to watch her stepping into challenges and growing in confidence.

Location check in 🗺 — Home for Work ⚒️

I got a little bit behind on this, but am all caught up and back in the saddle now. Have a listen to my song a day for 2023 playlist.

Freddie deBoer:

I have a niche, a narrow one but big enough for me - a leftist who maintains a commitment to civil liberties and procedural fairness, and who has serious criticisms of social justice politics, who’s nonetheless not willing to follow many “anti-woke” writers down a rabbit hole that leads inevitably to social conservatism. People want critical analysis of social justice politics that’s fair and accurate and which doesn’t presume a rejection of the basic left project of equality and shared prosperity, and that’s what I (intend to) provide.

Yes to “critical analysis of social justice politics that’s fair and accurate and which doesn’t presume a rejection of the basic left project of equality and shared prosperity.” More of this, please.